Remí swagga muffin

pheebadohdoh:

usoppsass:

IM GONANa FuCkiNG PEE MY PAN t s

canadianslut:

I wish my name was Zoe so I could introduce myself like this

spookymormon:

spookymormon:

my mom always texts me rude things so ive just started replying with an emoji of an eggplant and it gets her so pissed it’s great

blein:

sO my friend’s dog died and she lives in new york city and so she had to take it to the vet by the subway and she put the dead dog in the suitcase on the subway and it was a pretty big dog and some dude saw that she was struggling with the suitcase so he asked if she needed help with it and he said do you mind me asking what’s in it and she didnt want to say a dead dog so shE SAID IT WAS A BUNCH OF LAPTOPS SO HE TOOK THE SUITCASE AND RAN AND I JUST 

breadmaakesyoufat:

dontyoulovemebaby:

breadmaakesyoufat:

GUYS ITS 2:AM AND I FORGOT WHAT OATMEAL MEANT AND I THOUGHT IT WAS AN EMOTION AND I SAID OUTLOUD “IM FEELING VERY OATMEAL” BUT IT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE, SO I LOOKED UP OATMEAL, BUT I SPENT 20 MINUETS CONTEMPLATING IF IT ACTUALLY WAS AN EMOTION AND IF GOOGLE WAS LYING

this text post is so oatmeal

i hate you

finalblessing:

      will smith everybody

suprassnapbacksandtanks:

pluto-was-real:

monilip:

samandriel:

soshootastar:

who wants to be a part of the pluto fandom

#it’s okay pluto I’m not a planet either

I feel like I have been waiting for this post my whole life

I swear everyone on this site is high.

assiest:

sex-doesnt-alarm-me:

assiest:

i am 41 cheetos tall 

Why did you think you needed to measure yourself in Cheetos?

we were out of doritos 

jonnovstheinternet:

tastefullyoffensive:

9 Cats Taking Selfies

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love game to me

sweettoothwanderlust:

i tried to scroll past it